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You’re Redundant

16/10/2013

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Quite frankly it was a surprise when, early in September, I was called to the Commercial Director’s office and told that my position had become untenable due to a “restructuring exercise”, and I was being made redundant. A surprise only in the sense that I had been given a permanent contract just a few months earlier – but then surprises are the norm when you’re employed by Arriva Malta….

I could probably write volumes on how this company works (or doesn’t…) but deep down I'm a really decent person and least said soonest mended. I will just say that my experience working alongside Englishmen has left me with two very distinct after effects. First: my passion for the England football team has almost evaporated; last night I caught myself perversely cheering Poland just because one of their players was a Wolves man a couple of seasons back. Second: I now understand how a harmless but determined man once described by Churchill as a “half naked fakir” could single-handedly rip out Britain’s jewel in the crown and effectively set the ball rolling to dismantle the largest empire the world has ever seen…

Initial shock over,  I set out to look for a job – knowing full well the age discrimination rampant in the local job market – basically if you’re over forty-five or so employers will simply not look at you. Never mind that the ETC website marks most jobs’ age eligibility as being between 0 and 99 years. So much for the abolition of child labour…

In the past month or so I’ve applied for a variety of jobs with pretty much normal sounding titles:  Administrative Assistant… Office Administrator... Administration Executive… Operations Executive… Studio Officer… Purchasing and Logistics Assistant… Content Writer…well you get the idea. I have had no more than two acknowledgements at most and a solitary vague answer from one company that they will be in touch in October… I also know for a fact that none of my prospective employers bothered to have as much as a peek at what I draw and write on this site, not even when the job on offer ha
d anything to do with art, graphics, illustration or writing.

Of course I've steered away from the funnier sounding job titles but being an art aficionado a vacancy for a Sandwich Artist caught my eye...

This is the moniker now apparently in use by a renowned world franchise for the person who slices your bread, puts in the ham and cheese, adds the mustard or mayo and takes your cash.  The only difference from your reliable hobza biz-zejt vendor is that the persons this franchise employ make it incredibly difficult for you to make a purchase…

Not that I have any disrespect for people who serve you your sandwich but I honestly think the job title of Sandwich Artist does nothing to elevate such a person’s status - on the contrary, it is little more than an open invitation to ridicule.

I have had experience of this franchise quite recently. You may try to order a simple ham and cheese and expect to be served pronto. But no – out comes the first retort. Bread – will that be Italian, whole grain, white, brown…?  I go for the first thing that comes to mind and hope the issue is settled. But there is the all important ham decision next, will it be Parma, Modena, Genoa, Sampdoria, Internazionale or a Serie B ersatz? Same goes for the cheese. By this time I am tired of this crap and make a mental note not to visit again unless my very existence depends on the sandwich artist’s interrogation.

I find it difficult to fathom how this franchise trains its people to make the simplest purchase an obstacle course. Normal, well-adjusted people usually only stop here as it’s the quickest nosh in town. They certainly aren't eager to bond or form life-changing relationships with their server – polite service is enough and the multiple question quiz is the last thing on the customer’s mind.

Will I be applying to work as a sandwich artist? Hardly – unless I'm allowed to spread the mayo in the shape of a fist with the middle finger pointing defiantly upward on top of each sandwich I sell.


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Streets and Churches of Western Gozo

1/10/2013

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Everyone and his dog will tell you that Gozo is a different place from Malta; the place is definitely greener, the pace is slower, the traffic negligible… and laid back appears to be the operating system of the place.

While a stroll through some villages in Malta may entail a constant watch for oncoming traffic squeezing through impossibly narrow streets, there is little or none of it on Gozo  - and more so in the cooler months when the slow pace of life gets even more lethargic with fewer tourists around. At times you will walk through a place and get the feel it is completely deserted except for the fact that most houses appear well kept and a dog will bark or a cock crow somewhere to shatter the illusion.

If you are staying in Gozo for any length of time (lucky you) a village crawl is a pleasant way to familiarize oneself with the place and an ideal spot to set off is the hilltop village of Zebbug.


Zebbug actually sits across two adjoining hillocks bridged by a narrow ridge. There is not much in the way of built environment to lure you here actually, but the views from practically every street corner are nothing short of stunning – collectively providing a 360 degree vista of the island. The simple parish church dominates the airy central square. The church’s main point of interest is the extensive use of a limestone form of onyx quarried from a nearby hill. This decorative stone was utilized extensively in local church decorations but here in Zebbug they really went overboard…altar, columns, confessional boxes and baptismal font are all carved from this rather pretty pinkish stone.

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Picture perfect- the tiny village of Ghasri viewed from Zebbug
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You can move to the next village, Ghasri, via the broad main road; but a more interesting way is to make your way down the steep Triq il-Kanun (ask for it if you can’t find it) which winds its way through terraced fields and ends besides a small chapel sitting next to the watercourse of Wied il-Ghasri. Make your way upstream via the road and another ten minutes will get you to Ghasri village proper. Ghasri is even smaller than Zebbug and similarly quiet. You will probably come across instances of keys kept in front door locks – a sure sign of the lack of any serious crime in these parts. This probably also explains why the Police station here (and in most of the other villages) is invariably closed!

Take the winding Triq il-Fanal to the right of the Ghasri parish church – an open road with good views of the Ghammar hill on the left and the Gordan lighthouse perched on the next hill. You will walk past the tiny hamlet of Ghammar – the smallest settlement in Gozo consisting of just one street and a few alleys; even its tiny chapel is well hidden in a side lane.

Past tiny Ghammar the lovely Ta Pinu National Shrine comes into view, sited majestically in the open countryside. Built in the 1920’s in the Romanesque style, this is probably the loveliest church erected in the twentieth century in the Maltese Islands – not least because of the richness of design in the sculpted decorations inside, with innumerable variations of abstract carving and no single motif repeated anywhere. This is also a place of great devotion and a magnet for pilgrims all year round - take time to look at the huge (if somewhat bizarre) collection of votive offerings inside the church; witness to an Island’s deep rooted faith. The greatest day in the history of the church was probably 26th May 1990 – when the late Pope John Paul II – the first Pontiff to visit Malta, let alone Gozo - celebrated Holy Mass in the piazza and all of Gozo flocked here to greet him.

If you are feeling energetic you might want to trudge up the Way of the Cross which starts across the road in front of the church…it’s a steep climb to the top of Ghammar hill with statues depicting scenes from the Passion of Christ dotted along the way. Needless to say there’s a breathtaking panorama from the top.

Leaving Ta Pinu, retrace your steps by a couple of hundred feet and take the road which will lead you to the next village – Gharb. It’s another country road which passes over the valley below via a newly restored stone bridge and affords splendid views of Ta Pinu church’s eastern end and belfry.

Gharb is the remotest village in Gozo and one of the oldest as well. Look out for a number of ancient stone balconies on buildings – rare almost everywhere else but quite common here. There is a lovely parish church with a curious concave façade dating from 1699 gracing the village’s main square. A privately owned folklore museum housed in an eighteenth century house also graces the square. Its twenty eight rooms give a comprehensive view of trades and crafts formerly practiced in the Islands, with an extensive collection of related tools and implements.


This article was first published in the October 2013 edition of Il-Bizzilla - the Air Malta inflight magazine
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